Fit to be a parent??

So I was returing our rented shampooer to Safeway on Monday and I decided to take Carter out of the carseat and carry him in the store with me.
While waiting for someone to help me, I sat Carter on the counter and gave him a rattle which he started pounding on the glass countertop.
When the Customer Service girl came to help me, she was gooing and gaaing at Carter and having a gay ol time with him.
She needed me to sign some paperwork, at which point I picked Carter up and held him while I grabbed the pen. She offered to hold the paper and all I had to do was sign, but I told her it was ok, it was actaully easier if I used the same hand I was holding Carter in to hold the paper and I would sign with my other hand.
She said ' Oh I figured you Moms wouldnt need any help! You guys have it all figured out!".

Its funny how sometimes you feel like you are having a disaster day, you havent showered( your messy hair in a half assed pony tail is the sure-fire sign!), your kid just puked all over his jacket and crapped his diaper (to which even a homeless person would say stinks) and to someone elses eyes, you have it all together, the perfect Mom.

But what makes a 'perfect' parent?
Your age? Your marital status? The fact that you've wanted kids since you got your first dolly at the tender age of 2?

I was watching this episode of Dr Phil (or Dr Full as Mark likes to call him!) a few weeks ago, and they had a 17yr old girl with her 18yr old bf and they were battling with everyone about the upbringing of their infant daughter.
Everyone was against them. Everyone but the boys father, and me. The boys father was allowing the teens to live with him, and he was helping out with raising his little granddaughter.

Now, I am not all for babies having babies, but yes, they did make a mistake and got pregnant (the first time they had sex, as they claim) and yes, they are young and unemployed, but does that make them bad parents? The 18yr old did have some random part time jobs, so its not like he was sitting on his ass all day playing video games and not making an effort. Were they financially prepared to take on a responsibility so huge as a BABY? No, but who is? You always hear the excuse of people saying 'oh, were going to wait until we can afford it.' If you wait, you aint having kids. Everyone is poor. Get over it. Its called the Recession.
Dr Phil showed a couple pics of the very cute little girl. She was healthy, bright and alive. They were doing something right! There was one picture that showed the baby laying on her tummy to sleep, and Dr Full went on a rampage about they were awful parents since they should know that that causes SIDS, to which the teen mom replied her doctor told her to put her to sleep that way.
If you dont want this 17yr old girl to be a mother to her baby simply because she lays her to sleep on her stomach then take my child away too.
I stopped breastfeeding my child at 4 months. (Oh gasp- the agony. Whisper Whisper Whisper)
My kid has plowed his head onto the floor more times in the last month than I can could on 2 hands, the most recent episode being 2 hrs go.
We let him chew on a pea pod 3 nights ago and we are pretty sure he bit the tip of the pod off and started chocking since his face went all red and he was only half breathing and coughing.

Am I proud of these things?
Absolutely not.
But my kid is just that, a kid.
He is going to fall and even break bones.
He is going to swallow something whole and have a hard time digesting it.
He is going to eat grass. Touch dog poo. Play with his weenie. Pick his nose and eat it and probably enjoy it!

Just because they are teens does not make them bad parents.
Just because I am a 26 yr old married woman does not make me a good parent.

If people gave up kids every single time just because they were teenagers, or just because they were single, or just because they didnt feel like they had the nurturing mother gene, then we would have a whole lotta lonely kids in this world.

Millions of teens, single parents, poor parents, rich parents and crackheads alike have been raising their children for years. This is not a new concept. There is no such thing as a perfect parent.
No one knows what goes on behind closed doors. All you are seeing is what they want you to see.

1/2 way to 1

Carter is 6 months old.
1/2 a year.
26 weeks.

No matter how I say it, he is growing up so fast. No longer my little helpless baby boy. He is my independent, smart and happy little boy.

In the first few months when I was really struggling with Carters tummy problems and my anxiety, I would have paid any amount of money to fast forward the time through all the heartache and pain, and now that he is growing up so fast, and learning new things and becoming this little human being, I would pay any amount of money to slow time down.

Every day is a new journey with this guy, and sometimes we just sit there for a half an hour making silly faces and smiling at each other. My heart is filled with so much love for him.

I think that this is the best age. He is so alert and understands so much, can entertain himself, and laughs at the silliest things, but can't talk back or move!


At 6 months, Carter
- is 16lbs 2 oz
- is 26 1/2 inches long
- is wearing 6 month and 6-9 month clothing
- sits on his own
- hates loud sounds like the vaccuum and my blowdryer
- loves peek-a-boo
- loves when I sing to him, espcially Wheels on the Bus
- still loves faces, but now grabs for the hair and glasses
- still no teeth
- eats 2 meals of rice cereal, and has had sweet potatoes but doesn't care for them
- loves to walk, and will stand on his own when propped up against something
- will balance himself when he's wobbly when he stands
- just started sleeping through the night again
- makes all sorts of sounds, espeically 'm' sounds
- loves to raspberry with his tongue and sent spit flying everywhere
- thinks the dog is hilarious when he licks his lips or yawns or chews his bone
- will push himself up when doing tummy time
- can roll but doesnt
- is all over in his crib now, he is never in the same spot you put him to sleep in
- is taking his sweet time growing his hair
- recognizes faces (me, Mark, grandparents, playgroup)

5 amazing months!

I think I say this every month, but I cannot believe another month has passed!
I love watching this little baby grow into a little man, he is learning things so fast and has become very interesting to watch.
I am completely smitten with him!

At 5 months, Carter:
- is 15lbs 8 oz (slowest weight gain to date, 8 little ounces!)
- is 25.5 inches long
- is in 3-6 month and 6 month clothing
- is always talking and has even started shrieking and making all kinds of different sounds with his voice
- has started to raspberry and is sticking his tongue out now
- still has everything in his mouth, this teething process is ridiculous
- loves touching faces, and grabbing hair, clothes and everything else he can get his little hands on
- hasn't rolled over yet, but will get onto his side from his back
- still hates tummy time and usually results in puke all over the place
- is still a puker. We were doing good for a couple weeks and now the regular Carter Pukemachine is back
- loves laughing. Kissing his belly always results in major giggles
- loves playing in his excersaucer and jumperoo and jolly jumper
- still not sleeping thru the night, but he usually gives me a solid 7 hrs
- will splash in the pool when he sees someone else splashing first
- is starting to sit on his own (hellejulah! he DOES know how to sit)
- really dislikes his carseat and doesnt always fall asleep in the truck anymore....boooo!
- is starting rice cereal today
- loves petting Cheeko....Cheeko has different feelings about this action
- is starting cold #2.....baby colds are BRUTAL
- rubs his eyes when he is tired

4 months

The Beast is 4 months old!

At 4 months, Carter:
- is 15lbs (holy porker!)
- 24 3/4 inches short
- is now on formula
- is putting everything in his mouth
- is getting better at tummy time, but will usually last only a few minutes
- has found his feet, but prefers to use the left hand only
- survived his first cold
- went on a roadtrip to Calgary
- can sit on his lonesome for a few seconds
- still prefers to stand
- loves screens...TV, computer, cell phones
- is not sleeping thru the night anymore
- is in 3-6 month clothes, but some sleepers are close to retirement
- is moving in size 3 diapers
- always watches us eat, and will grab the bowl/plate
- likes to hear himself talk....especially at 4am
- hates being restrained (carseat, bumbo)
- will do a half sit-up to try and get out of his carseat, vibrating chair and swing

Tired

No one said being a parent was going to be the hardest job of my life.
And I've had a lot of jobs.



I am so tired.
I am so tired of being puked on.
I am so tired of people telling me its normal. Its not.
I am so tired of telling people my kid pukes a lot, and then he never pukes around people.
I am so tired of putting a clean pair of jeans on, or a nice shirt and having it puked on 2 seconds alter.
I am so tired of wearing the same old pukey pajamas for days on end.
I am so tired of my carpets and furniture and brand new $300 rocking chair being puked on.
I am so tired of doing laundry.
I am so tired of my cranky baby.
I am so tired of waking at night to feed him.
I am so tired of barely making it 2 hrs before he wants to eat.
I am so tired of breastfeeding and the dedication it takes.
I am so tired of trying to get back to sleep in the middle of the night.
I am so tired of feeling like a single parent.
I am so tired.
I.am.so.tired.

I dont know what I was expecting out of parenthood, but this wasnt it.

* DISCLAIMER:
I love my son to bits, and I wouldnt trade him for the world
I guess I am just having a hard time with sleep deprivation and still trying to adjust to my new world.

1/4 of a year?!

Here we are, January 18th, and my little man is 3 months old!
These 3 months have been an adventure!

Carter, at 3 months:

- is 23 3/4 inches long
- is 13lbs 13oz
- is wearing 3-6 month clothing
- is starting to teeth
- loves his hands(see previous bullet)
- is always eating his bibs or blankets(see above!)
- is finally starting to use his hands to grasp things
- can roll onto his side
- has taken his first road trip...to Taber!
- is in swimming lessons
- has boatloads of smiles
- has laughed a few times(at the dog, or when he's tickled)
- still loves mobiles
- loves to stand all the time
- hates to sit, he will launch himself out of his bumbo
- can sleep through the night most nights
- is still a huge puker

2 down

Here we are, another month gone by, and I cannot believe it!
I feel like an old pro at this parenting thing.
Some days are definitely a lot better than others, but I am loving watching this little baby turn into a little boy with a personality.
Its an amazing process!!

At 2 months, Carter is:

-12lbs
- 23 1/4 inches long
- wearing some newborn clothes, moving into 0-3 month stuff
- sleeping at least 4hrs a night, sometimes as much as 6 hours
- smiling and cooing a lot more
- still a redhead with blue eyes
- looking more and more like Dad every day
- staying awake for hours at a time during the day, sometimes all day
- wanting a soother to fall asleep with at night most nights
- wanting to stand all the time, which makes burping him on my lap very hard
- always swinging his hands
- holding his head up all the time
- sitting in his bumbo from time to time
- still not interested in hanging out with his play mat. It can hold his interest for about 5 mins
- loves all mobiles. He will cry when they stop moving
- still a puker
- moving into size 2 diapers
- too big for the bassinet in his playpen